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Film Muser Rating : 0 / 5
Release Date : March 23, 2007
Running Time : 89 minutes
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The mutants are at it again in The Hills Have Eyes 2. In this sequel written by Wes and Jonathon Craven, a team of military scientists are sent to investigate the strange happenings in the former nuclear test site known as Sector 16. When the team goes missing, a group of National Guard trainees are sent in on a search and rescue mission. As the team scour the rocky terrain of Sector 16 in search of any survivors, they soon find themselves on the run, desperately trying to fend off the radioactive mutants that live in the hills.

Wes Craven’s The Hills Have Eyes 2

The Hills Have Eyes 2 is categorized as a horror film, but sadly it provides more laughs than screams. This movie is not scary in the least. Just because there are murderous nuclear-scarred mutants who get off on mutilating their victims in the film, doesn’t automatically make it scary. So many horror movies these days provide oodles of gore, but they lack any elements that classic horror films had that actually made them scary. Even for those that are watching this movie strictly for the gore will have a hard time getting passed its complete idiocy.

I’m not sure any film has ever portrayed such an incompetent military unit. Sure they are trainees, but this was supposed to be their final training mission, so you would think they would have some knowledge of combat techniques. This group seems to have the combat skills of seven year olds playing ‘war’ in the backyard. I’m not sure who the military adviser for this film was, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was some college kid who used to play Rainbow 6 on his computer. I think they were hoping that giving the cast guns and dressing them up in military fatigues would somehow fool us. It’s also pretty hard to look passed how a bunch of hill mutants who use axes and stones as weapons can totally annihilate a team armed with M-16s.

The acting is hilarious. Sgt. Jeffrey ‘Sarge’ Millstone, played by Flex Alexander is in charge of the trainees, and is supposed to come off as a bad-ass, hard-nosed instructor. Instead he just comes off as a bad actor trying to play a bad-ass, hard-nosed instructor. The rest of the actors look brilliant in comparison, but that doesn’t really say much. Honestly, I’m sure some of them are pretty decent at what they do, but the script really didn’t give them much along the lines of good dialog.

I definitely preferred the first film in this series (I’m not referring to the original 1977 version, which I haven’t seen), but keep in mind that I would have rated that one a zero as well. Being subjected to viewing such cruelty imposed on a people with no real rhyme or reason is not entertainment. To have any merit as a film there needs to be something beyond the gore and violence to give some sort of purpose to The Hills Have Eyes 2. If you’re looking for cheap chills and thrills, this film definitely does not deliver, and even for the gore fanboys out there, there is nothing we haven’t already seen in similar films. And that brings up the question of how much further do we really want to take these gore movies?

Memorable Scene
Spoiler Alert
PFC Amber Johnson and PFC David ‘Napoleon’ Napoli are left at base-camp while the rest of the National Guard team head up the mountains in search of the military scientists. It’s not long before nature calls, and Napoli heads into a porta-potty to take care of some business. While sitting on the potty a hand reaches up from within, sending Napoli flying out of the porta-potty. The two PFCs then head back in and get to witness one of the military scientists force himself out of the toilet, covered in you know what. It turns out that the mutants covered his body with hundreds of little cuts, and stuffed him into the toilet, letting the bacteria slowly ravage his body.